So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Success! We fucked roommates!
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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