Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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