The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize