covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
