Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
