he wants to bone in the snuggie
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
