Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
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