fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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