Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize