You're so nebulous sometimes
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
This house was built for laser tag.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
