Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize