Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
