is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
