I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
