First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
