i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
She needs sedatives and a leash
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
This is my gift to your gina
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
