Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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