i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
