thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I won't apologize to a one balled man
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Randomize
