my mouth tastes like poor choices
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
