is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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