He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
