He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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