i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
