I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
