My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
