I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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