She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
