when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
