how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
