Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
