Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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