'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize