Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
