And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
