What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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