Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
