you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
