Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
third nipple confirmed
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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