he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
