i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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