No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize