I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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