I hate all girls vehemently.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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