Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
