Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
