Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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