He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
