So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
