She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
