are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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